Tag Archives: satire

COMMIE-THUG: TEDDY BOY CRUZ

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“Who the hell elected you and put you in charge of what the media are allowed to report and what the American people are allowed to hear…?” asked TBC.

TEDDY-BOY CRUZ (TBC) does not believe in the First Amendment of the United States Constitution. TEDDY BOY CRUZ does not believe in the flag, free enterprise, capitalism and in the American way.

TBC is a senator from Texas. As Senator TBC is a member of Congress. What does the First Amendment of the Constitution state? “Congress shall make no law…abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press…” Why is TBC, as a member of Congress, asking any questions? Why is TBC investigating? The Constitution states, “Congress shall make no laws…” End of questions. End of investigation. End of story.

See that TBC asked the witness why he had the power to determine what was posted? TBC forgets, and the reason he forgets is fat. I could have done without the witness with a nose ring and the goofy beard. But TBC is growing a very sketchy beard. What is TBC hiding behind that bush? I think it’s fat, and like all of Don Trump’s ardent supporters, TBC has become fat, dumb and happy. Indeed, much of TBC’s fat has gone to his brain.

TBC never made an investigation of any other media company. Of course, every media company has a right to post, or not to post, to broadcast or not to broadcast. Indeed, the sources of the information in question reeks of propaganda from Joseph Goebbels. It was initially printed in 

The New York Post, a common Goebbels outlet. No New York Post reporter wanted a by-line which means the story came straight from the Propaganda Ministry. [The publisher was so unimaginative that he failed to make up the name of a reporter and give a by-line.] Investigation into the facts of this material cannot substantiate events or a time-line. The human beings are alive, but nobody went to a Texas football game and rooted for the Russians.

Note under the First Amendment of the Constitution no one must publish anything. And no one has a right to have published erroneous, malicious and fake claims. The story might have been accepted if it had elements of humor. But the Nazis were humorless bastards, especially when the materials’ primary source is Rudy Guiliani. He is beyond humor, satire and parody. Saturday Night Live no longer bothers.

If Trump loses, will anyone ever speak to Rudy? There will be no book deals. Rudy is not the type of guy to kiss and tell. Roy Rogers wrote a very revealing book about Trigger. The Russians are finished with Rudy. Perhaps Roger Stone and other thugs Trump wants to pardon will say hello but nothing else. 

Given the background and the sources of the New York Post printing, Teddy Boy Cruz cannot demand anyone print falsehood and take news. Yet, TBC insists the media companies have done everything wrong! Like a Commie-Thug TBC wants lies and fake news published, BUT TBC has made no investment in those companies. He has no financial interest.

While worrying about falsities, falsies and fake news, TBC have not subpoenaed and questioned Rupert Murduch, Gauleiter of Fox News. Imagine Teddy Boy Cruz’s first question to Murdoch: “Wasn’t that a wonderful story this morning where Fox News ripped Hillary Clinton a new one?”

However, Fox News and Sports has not published anything that can be verified. For example, Fox News and Sports has never claimed that Don Trump is a better golfer than Barrick Obama.

ALERT!

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Don Trump is now blaming the Mexicans for starting the coronavirus and spreading it by selling Corona beer. The nouns are related; they start with the same six letters. Don knows no verbs. And forget about one inconsistency. The beer is capitalized; the virus is not. It is Don’s plan to make the virus smaller and smaller in print so no one can read of it and it will be forgotten. He’ll blame Mexico.

No one in Don’s family drinks beer so they haven’t gotten the Mexican virus – the Trumps are ripple people. Mexicans, though, are crafty, nefarious people. They’ll go back to work as soon as they can. They don’t like the border wall, refusing to pay for it and now they’re making redneck Americans, some with orange hair, pay and be sick. They offer Corona beer as a virus cure, but the reckless behavior it causes spreads infections. Don Trump is cancelling Cinco de Mayo. Feliz Navidad is in jeopardy, too.

Americans cannot be outdone by the Mexicans, who wear bandannas as face coverings like they are all banditos. Don Trump knows all about this. He saw a movie, the third sequel of THE MAGNIFICENT FIVE. (People can’t venture into nineteenth century Mexico often and expect everyone to come out alive, but Yul Brenner needed the roles.) The next sequel eagerly awaited by Don was in pre-production: The Magnificent Three and a Half. It was going to be a remake of THREE MEN AND A BABY. The powers-to-be wrapped that. However, the concept came back on TV as TWO AND A HALF MEN.

Don Trump believes the Wall will keep the virus out. Kelly Ann said so. She’ll never return to New York City. Don Trump has already departed there to go to a hot spot, Mira-a-Lago where every blade of grass on the golf course festers coronavirus. The virus becomes active then Don Trump drives off road, or off the beaten path, which he frequently does because Don always plays from the rough. Don Trump is reconsidering the move. There is no coronavirus at the Trump Yukon course where the President’s boys, Eric and Don, (also known as the two Fredos, no movie in pre-production) like to shoot mice. (Ever see the excellent movie, NEVER CRY WOLF?) The advantage of the Yukon development is it is farther from Mexico.

BACHELORETTE

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This movie is a satire. The setting is the wedding of a heavy-set woman. She invites three attractive, fashionable friends from high school; there is a sense of high school reunions combining with the downside of wedding preparations and parties.

The satire is about the three women (Dunst, Fisher and Caplan) who act like they are still in middle school. At a moment of sadness Dunst says, “I did everything right. I went to college. I exercise. I eat like a normal person. My boyfriend is in medical school.” She is lost in life. Caplan asks, “Are you all right?” “No, I’m fucking miserable.” All three women acting as girls are inept at human relationships, sad and unhappy.

Their conversation is juvenile. Their actions are juvenile. Their reactions are juvenile. Their judgment is absent. A seamstress is sorely needed; they run around until Fisher says, “I can sew.” But she is too wasted.

The men in the movie are surprisingly grown up and likable. The groom likes his bride-to-be. Fisher’s man was a high school classmate: She copied his French homework but only remembers she sold her pot. He refuses to sleep with her because she’s wasted: “You can’t remember my name.” The other women get unthinking sex, and one guy is in love again (previous high school romance went sour). 

The movie is less about lines, put-downs, and sit-com set-ups, it’s tone, and mostly about 30 year-olds trying to be young forever. Ageless youth of no maturing – The Portrait of Dorian Gray. The three women have avenues to escape youth. Whether they do leave is likely the stories of several dramas.